The Dodge Viper has a notorious reputation for being a mean, unforgiving car. With an 8.0-liter V10 engine, rear-wheel drive, a manual transmission and minimal nannies, it’s not a car for those easily intimidated.
A 2001 Dodge Viper R/T owner is using the Viper’s notorious reputation to help him sell the rather scary machine on Cragslist, typing up a humorous ad that we think perfectly describes what it’s like to hop behind the wheel of the snake.
The opening sentence really says it all: “Okay. Full disclosure. I almost killed myself in it.”
He then proceeds to warn any prospective buyers of the perils of driving the car, saying he’d feel too bad not telling them what a death trap it can be if it lands in the wrong hands:
“I will not have your soul on my conscience. You need to know what you are getting into. What insane level of crazy you are buying.”
But our favorite party of the ad comes when he compares the Viper to a hitman that works for free:
“We all know one person that for the right amount of money would kill you. But since no one is paying, they smile in your face and go about their day. It’s like that except the Viper doesn’t bother to ever pretend it doesn’t want to kill you. And it will do it for free.”
If you’re in the mood for a quick laugh, check out the full listing here.
Via Opposite Lock